Self Care: Protecting my innocence. Protecting my Love.

Hey Guys! I hope you all are ready to indulge!

Sometimes, I ask myself, What am I not doing???

As a 27 year old Woman, life can get overwhelming. On a day to day basis, I juggle being a full time Mommy (Best thing ever), my career, being a full time student and also all the other crowns I wear from time to time. LIFE gets HARD to say the least. Let me start by saying it is OK if you do not have it all figured out as long as you are trying to figure it out. Second Step is putting ACTION behind everything, Because as we all know Faith without work is DEAD.

*A Little Background Info* 

I am currently sending in my application for the nursing program (Yayy!) I am scared, scared of rejection not only from the school but just rejection period. In the midst of being frighten of rejection I am learning to trust GOD more and more. I know that whatever he has for me will be and if it is not for me, he has something better in store.

January

I can see the Light at the end of the Tunnel

The month started off so bumpy. Stressed to say the least. But I released distractions + negativity by learning to refocus on what matters. I shifted my attention inward, reflected on my intentions, and rooted deeply into what I knew to be true. I realized that I was in charge of my healing. I was in charge of being present in that process. I was in charge of piecing myself back together. I had to own that. hold it close. protect it. I rarely ask for help, but I need to get better at that. even though I want to do it all, I am learning to honor the fact that I can't.

No love Lost, I’ll still choose love 10x over.

I’ve learned so much in the last few years but one of the most important realizations that I hold dear is the moment I claimed my worth and my value. I was in a very low place and I settled in every aspect of my life. I downplayed myself. I was involved with people who I had no business associating myself with. Individuals who treated me like I wasn’t worthy of loyalty and consistency and it only made me feel insecure and lonely. But one day I had no choice but to let go of these attachments that made me feel less than and I began to work on myself. I found this voice inside of me during my solitude... I started to write daily affirmations, dedicated more time to self care, focused on getting my health on track and let go of my negative characteristics. I finally arrived at a place in my life where my self worth/value became a priority and anything or anyone who couldn’t honor this didn’t deserve my time, space and energy. Now I’m at a place in my life where I can proudly say that I haven’t settled and nothing is beyond my reach. I know my worth and my value and that is my STRONGEST asset.

Can I Trust You?

As family, friends, or lovers.. we wont always agree  —but do u respect our differences & trust that truth can be found in separation too? in my ignorance, before u ridicule me, can u respect where I’m at & if short of where I should stand, can u teach me instead. Show me balance before the lectures?

February

In 2018, What is Dating?

 Firstly I know absolutely NOTHING about dating, but I do know relationships are hard to come by and even harder to make work in the long term. Here are a few Tips to take forward if & when you start to date.

 Firstly: Second, Third Dates

No cell Phones, Ask Questions, Make eye Contact.

Secondly: Getting to Know each other

Make an effort, Be a good listener, Compliments

Thirdly: Better Dates

 Intimate Dates, Up, Close & personal

Fourthly: Getting to Know each other more intimately

 Make yourself more available, Make each other a priority, Be open & Honest

Fifth: Lose the Judgment

Give each other a FAIR SHOT, Listen to their needs, be thoughtful

Six: Real Connections
Be Intentional; When you have sex too soon, you tend to focus on the sex and not the relationship. We tend not to see potential issues because you are in the lust phase, If you are seeing other people this is the time to say so before "Real" feelings get involved. If you don't feel a connection, MOVE ON, this is a perfectly normal part of dating.

Seven: Rules about sex

Both Climax, want the person more than you want to have sex with them. Talk about your sexual needs.

Before you enter into someones space.. clarify exactly what you want, Be Transparent, Be Intentional. Be sure you know your worth. Here are a view tips from my Soul Sister, Christie.. Be sure to subscribe to her blog below.

http://fortyspears.blogspot.com/

Before: Be complete in your singleness. Have that control of what you’re focusing on in your life. Get up every day knowing that you are chasing your passion! You have to know your self-worth and that you are the person who brings joy to yourself, first! You can’t depend on another person to do that for you, you’ll be waiting for quite a while!

During: Resist temptation. I’m being real because it’s true. Some people may ask, what do I do to keep myself occupied? Work in your field. Do things you like. I know there are some things that are past due in your life right now like mine. This could be journaling, networking, scheduling, simply enjoying the moment and finding the good although opposing forces come daily. HOWEVER, working in your field does not mean that you aren’t pouring into your potential mate’s life. Share stories and see if there is a connection. Complement each other. Go on “dates” and have dinner. Catch a movie or have a game night. The list goes on.

Process: You will know if someone is for you. Deep down in your soul, there’s this thing called intuition. Don’t question it. It is not meant to be questioned. Take all things that you know and sort them. Align your lifestyles to see if they match! We have to end this with clarity. We have to be straightforward and concise when it comes to these topics.  We don’t want any new surprises AFTER we’ve started what we THOUGHT we wanted. Be clear, or as B says, be transparent.

Be sure to Subscribe to her blog for more inspiring posts!

Remember there is a love that deserves you, but also remember just because you want it doesn't mean it deserves you. Love will make you lose yourself and find yourself in the same breath. Space and Pace. -B